Daydreaming

Call it stir crazy. Call it plain nuts. But I keep finding myself searching the inter-webs for 2014 races and triathlons.  

Since I started running 6 years ago, this is the longest stretch of time that I haven't been training for something. Whether it be a simple 5k, triathlon or marathon, I have always had a goal on the horizon and something to work toward. (Let's clarify: I haven't actually finished a marathon, but I've trained for two so that totally counts. Kind of).

Obviously being pregnant changed that. I couldn't push myself like before and to be honest, I didn't have much motivation. I know myself- if there isn't a race to train for, why train? Why get up early or out in the cold when there is no "real" reason to. 

(This is where someone can say, "But Alex, being healthy and active, especially during pregnancy IS a real reason." Apparently that isn't good enough for me.  Who cares about that stuff, really?) 

2013 was the year of zero fitness accomplishments. I am totally okay with that. And I'm even okay if this year doesn't amount to much either. Because let's get real, I have no idea what my life is going to look like after Baby. All the time I had for myself- mornings, evenings, weekends- I'm giving a lot of that up to snuggle, love, and take care of my sweet baby. 

On top of that, my pending thyroidectomy and subsequent radiation therapy puts another big question mark on what my life will look like. I would love to plan for a late triathlon but what if treatment, which should be around July, kicks my booty and sets me back? I would hate to have a self-imposed expectation that might only cause disappointment.

So, as I read race reviews and calculate possible training schedules for the 2014 year, I do so with a healthy amount of hesitation. I promise that I will complete at least one half marathon, and I would love to add a triathlon to that as well. But we shall see.